I know the pain of losing someone, I lost my Dad in December. I know that is no comparison to the loss of your son. The could of would of should of will drive you crazy. Just know that all your feelings are normal, anger,denial,crippling sadness,pain,more anger will pass and come again and again. But you will survive. You will make it threw this. There's a song called "Cry Out To Jesus" by Third Day. It is a song that gives me comfort and I pray that you will find it and listen. You will be in my prayers, and know that you having people praying for you all over the country. We love you and God bless!
Love, Aunt Mellissa